“I don’t care what people think,” is a saying that has bothered me for some time as it doesn’t really accurately portray what one is trying to say…. Well, I care about people’s happiness and wellbeing, and I care about the development of their minds, and I care about their self-esteem and personal comfort zone. So, I really do care what people think.
On the other hand, I train myself not to WORRY about what they JUDGE concerning myself. I trust that I am loveable, though imperfect, and I trust that I can offer something to people that will be of value to them. If it’s not of value to them, well, that’s ok, I’m sure it’s of value to someone.
It’s important to me to know what people think, because that is part of keeping the lines of communication open, and gives me a chance to make changes if my behaviour is negatively affecting someone, and if there is actually something I CAN do to change my behaviour, without undue stress or angst to me, then I’m happy to accommodate other people’s desires and needs.
So, yeah… I care about what people think, but I don’t WORRY about what they might JUDGE. I’m free to be myself and be happy with my imperfect self, and so is everyone else. I don’t mind the differences between me and other people, and I’m always fascinated to understand what other people hold as important.
Got to admit, though, at times my neurochemistry is not quite right, and I do overstep boundaries without the least regard for them. And only after a good night’s sleep do I once more have the insight to see that I was experiencing some kind of neurological episode, and should have kept more to myself because my social judgement at the time was poor.
—Reflections of an unrepentant Aspie. (Me)